If Bass Boy could see me now...

Here I was laughing embarrassingly loud at Katy's post when I was silenced as it hit too close to home. I was reading it while watching Judge David Young*. And not doing the elliptical.

And eating pizza.

I don't feel bad though as:

• I had already done the jumping edition of P90X (which is getting so much easier) this morning. 
• It was only one slice, which I had factored into my points for the day.
  
• It had red peppers on it.
• I had made it myself and JESUS it was delicious.

I have trouble with the elliptical. I think its so fun and low impact, but I have learned that you only actually get results when you freaking PUSH yourself, rather than just going "WEEEE!" for 20 minutes. I find that pretty impossible. Its the same reason I run on the treadmill rather than outside. When the ground isn't falling out from under me its too easy to just go "Hmm...that's enough" and slow down to something leisurely.

Congrats on being called fit by a stranger! A gay friend and I were talking last night about how there is fit, and then there is Summer Fit. And then there is the far higher standard of Gay Fit. I don't even want to think about Gay Summer Fit. Right now I'm definitely feeling fit. But...Summer Fit? GAY FIT? Not yet...but we'll see. 

*I had never heard of it either. Judge David Young has none of the sass that you really need in a good TV judge. He makes up for it in ridiculous gimmicks though. He used a lie detector test. And then when the results were read, the person who had taken it had to go sit in a chair in a box. The box was labeled Lie Detector BOOTH. I found it hilarious that the self-explanatory "booth" was 10 times bigger than the "Lie Detector," but then I realized there was actually no "Lie Detector" in the booth. 

OMG: As I posted this The Family Court has started. Its a brother and sister and they are fighting about borrowed money. But apparently the brother lost 100 pounds! And the sister is really overweight! Fattie v. Former Fattie showdown! And now they are just arguing about fatness and food and stuff! I should probably get some sort of job before class, huh?!

Katy 4/28/09

Yesterday, since it was so nice out, Nikki and I attempted to go for a jog in Prospect Park. Of course, by "jog in the park" we really mean "powerwalk so we can gossip." Still, we had a good workout. When I looked it up on www.mapmyrun.com, it says we went 3.7 miles. Pretty good!

As we were walking, there was this really lanky guy pushing a bass. Since his legs were as tall as Nikki's whole self, he had a good stride going and was pretty much keeping up with us even though I felt like we were walking blazing fast. He was laughing at us as we were mocking a couple who we'd passed, "if he's gonna call me a mother fucker, I'm gonna act like a mother fucker!" (or Nikki's version, "if you're gonna call me a mother fucker, I'm gonna fuck your mother!")

So then conversation ensued...

Bass Boy (BB): "Why aren't you guys running? Powerwalking is for fat people. You guys are like... fit."
Nikki: "Because if we run, we can't talk to each other. And because we're lazy."
BB: "You're not lazy. Lazy people do the elliptical. Lazy people do the elliptical while watching People's Court and Judge Joe Brown."

Note: I absolutely do the elliptical 90% of the time I work out, and love to watch HGTV or, ironically, The Food Network while doing so. Yeah so, I loved him. We bid adieu and sent him on his way.

B:
Double fiber honey wheat English muffin - 1 pt [whole grain]
Laughing Cow - 1 pt [dairy]
Morningstar Farms sausage links - 1 pt [protein]

S:
Starbucks skinny vanilla latte - 2 pts [dairy complete]

L:
An awesome salad from Cer-te, with my other gay boyfriend/great friend/hair stylist, Dave.
Lettuce & tomatoes - 0 pts [veggie]
With couscous, lentils, olives, black beans and tuscan white beans - 4 pts [fiber/protein fantasy - protein complete]
Feta cheese - 2.5 pts [dairy super complete]
Oil & vinegar - 2.5 pts [oil complete]
2 little brownie bites - 2 pts [fatty orgasmo complete]

D:
Of course we stopped at a Mexican restaurant on the way home from our walk.
7 tortilla chips & salsa - 2 [veggie]
Veggie fajitas: Grilled broccoli, squash, zucchini and cauliflower; sauteed peppers, onions - 3 pts for any oil used although I honestly think there was barely any [veggie definitely complete!]
Whole wheat wrap to substitute flour tortillas - 3 pts [whole grain complete]

I dipped into my weekly flex points a little bit, but I feel okay about it because I was eating almost entirely HGs all day, with the exception of the brownie bites.

Katy 4/23/09

Hey all. I'm updating now because I'm leaving after work to go to Alex's, and then we're going up to Rochester for the weekend for his family party. I'm really, really hoping I make good choices (that means no garbage plates, frozen custard, or white hot dogs... sorry Rochester).

B: I mixed it up!
Double fiber honey wheat english muffin - 1 pt [whole grain]
w/Laughing Cow light - 1 pt [(fake) dairy]
2 Morningstar Farms breakfast links - 1 pt [protein]

L: from Metro
Salad with peas, beets, tomatoes, mushrooms - 0 pt [veggies x3]
...feta cheese - 1 pt [dairy, but probably not enough to count]
...kidney beans - 1 pt [protein]
...balsamic & oil - 2.5 pts [oil]
Tomato garden vegetable soup - 2 pts [veggies]

S: Starbucks
Haven't had it yet but since I've only used 9.5 pts, I think I'll have another Skinny Vanilla Latte and really get my dairy put away. - 2 pts [dairy]

That'll mean I have 9.5 pts for the rest of today, and the only HG I still have to get is maybe another fruit/veggie, since my servings were a bit ambiguous between the soup/salad.

Bobby - not to be a sleuth, but I am thinking I don't want to blog whammys as they happen. Obviously it'll be clear with the menus here, but with exercise I'm thinking no. This is still a competition after all... and I still want to kick your ass.

Ro-cha-cha-cha, cha-cha-cha-cha, cha-cha, sex me so good I said blah blah blah. Work it.


EDIT: As of 5:14pm I still have not had my Starbucks, but I did have 1 mini York peppermint pattie. Psha 1 point of glory.

Um, wow. Bluff Called. Bobby's Menu - 4/22/09

TRIPLE WHAMMIE. 49 Total!

I somehow convinced myself that Katy wasn't really going to work out again, and thus didn't get too stressed when I got sucked into American Idol (why?) rather than going to the pool. Then at 9:45 PM I checked the blog and saw that Katy had in fact scored the Triple Whammie. 

The pool closes at 10:30, but is very very close. As long as I got there by 10 PM, I could get in a solid swim. Unfortunately, I cleaned my room this weekend, so I spent from 9:45 - 10 PM running around my apartment screaming WHERE ARE MY GOGGLES!?!?! 

They were never found. I felt totally defeated. I'm really proud of us that we have now gotten to the point where someone who counts every single point and only works out for an hour feels like a total failure. With some encouragement from FF reader K. Holden Rumph (Thanks Ho!), I decided I could only be defeated by myself. Soooo, I did the 15 minutes of hell that is P90X: Ab RipperX, and then did (for the first time) the Biggest Loser CardioMax. You can pick out the workouts, so I made it 20 minutes, 10 of which were Jillian Michaels (use your imagination.) 

Total Points: 28/29 or 31/29 I'll explain.

Bobby's Breakfast Treat: 3 [dairy, a little fruit]

2 Eggs & 2 Wheat slices: 6.5  [protein, wheat]

1 Apple 1 [fruit]

23 Almonds 4

1/2 cup (2 servings) of Raisins 4 [Fruit]

A big salad, with lots of grape tomatoes, oil & vinegar 2.5 [Veggies, Oil]

5 Chicken Nibblers 6 [Protein]

Honey 1

I also had a protein drink (about 3 points) before my first workout. Usually I just drink one of those for each workout and don't really track it because of activity points. At this point I am concerned about having too few calories. I probably should have eaten a little more for that last point at the end of the day, but after my second workout it was LATE for eating so I figured I'd just count the shake. Or at least a point of it. 

Tomorrow is yoga day. I have never done more than a half an hour of the 1.5 hour P90X workout DVD, but tomorrow I'm doing the whole thing. The only time I can do it is 7 AM, so I'm hoping that I can use Katy's example for inspiration. I should have gone to bed but I had to stay up for Beyonce's performance on Letterman. Its the least I can do considering the amount of times I've listened to her latest album while working out this week.

I think at the end of the summer I want to be underwear model hot. 

Katy's menu - 4/22/09

My very first TRIPLE WHAMMY day. Worked out this morning, ate right (21/21 pts), and went to the gym after work to get some more cardio in. I am turning over a new leaf.


B:
High fiber cereal with berries and skim - 4 pts [fruit, dairy]

L:
1.5 oz whole wheat pasta, with oil and my Italian veggie stir fry mixed in, 1 tbsp grated cheese - 5.5 pts [whole grain, oil, veggie]
1/2 cup cooked black beans - 2 pts [protein]

S:
Starbucks skinny vanilla latte - 2 pts [dairy]

D:
Grillers Vegan veggie burger - 1 pt [protein]
on a toasted double fiber honey wheat English muffin - 1 pt [whole grain]
and lettuce - 0 pt [veggie]
Homemade sweet potato fries (7 oz) - 3.5 pts [veggie]
tossed in 1 tsp oil before roasting - 1 pt [oil]
with ketchup - 1 pt

A loose definition of "cooking."

Just as I tie it up Katy decides to go for the Tripple Whammie. Looks like I'm going to have to as well. 

The great thing about having a month left is that this is basically like the first month again. In February, we had the March 1st check in just around the corner. There was no time for excuses. We were also very vigilant about our whammies and our blogging, which had the side effect of us losing mad LBs. It went by in a blink and yet we made HUGE changes. We can do it again. Especially now if we have the daily head-to-head.

I always tell people that Weight Watchers is like magic. As long as you actually do it, it works. Easier said than done, but I'm going to try to repeat that to myself whenever I want to fall off the wagon. 

I'm down to 29 points a day :-(

Back to basics.

I got up and Shredded this morning. +1 AP for me. I'm going to give it my all to get a triple whammy today (it would be my first).

I also decided that, since our contest ends one month from today, I have to buckle down. I know I've been saying that for the past few weeks, and it hasn't been happening. No more "oh it's the weekend, okay, I can have ice cream every day," bologna. My "weekend" started out being only Sat-Sunday, and now my reckless eating pretty much takes place Thurs-Sunday. That's over half the week. This could be why I'm not seeing the results of my dreams, you think?

Anyway, in order to keep myself on track I'm reverting back to basics and I'm going to commit myself to blogging my daily menus again. When I was doing that, I was seeing bigger losses and I was being more responsible. I want 5 more lbs gone by the end of this thing.

So far today...
B: High fiber cereal with berries and skim - 4 pts (my body is getting too used to this, so I am going to have to find a new breakfast.)
L: We have a catered lunch from Havana Central (cuban), but I brought some leftover pasta to try and avoid that mess.
1.5 oz whole wheat pasta, with oil and my Italian veggie stir fry mixed in, 1 tbsp grated cheese - 5.5 pts

I'm tired of the rain.

I think all this rain we've had in the past few weeks is responsible for my lack of motivation to do...anything.

Anyway, no workout today, but I did play Guitar Hero. That doesn't count, does it?

APs, yes. Even if it meant coming home and eating an egg white to get in my last protein, and eating a piece of toast with oil on it (and salt), regardless of the fact I was terrifyingly nauseous. No time left to fuck around here.

This is my public declaration that I *have* to wake up early tomorrow and Shred. I'm writing this here so that when my alarm goes off at 7am and I go to hit snooze, guilt will overcome me and I will rise... From my nice, warm bed.

weirdmoodseeyabye.

I Whammy as well.

I got HG's Friday but forgot to blog them over the weekend (it was nice outside, sorry.) I figured it was a lost whammie but if Katy did the same I'm cool with us just both counting them. No whammies over the weekend, HG & AP yesterday.

Total Whammies: 44.

With 30 days remaining, it is possible to get at least 60 more whammies by eating right and working out every day. I'm obviously not getting my HG's on party day (unless i put a lot of limes in some sort of whole wheat beer...and then add some oil.) I do plan on working out first thing in the morning though.  44 + 59 = 103 = 4 extra pounds. Just saying. Beach ready in 30 days? We'll find out. Its not like I haven't lost 10 pounds in a month before, although these pounds seem to be way more stubborn. 

PS: I'm gaining weight. Awesome. And don't give me that "It's muscle" business. It's fat.

Whammy

Bobby freakishly resembles my ex boyfriend in that picture.

Anyway.

I know this is more than 2 days late but I hope you can forgive me -
Friday: HG
Saturday: AP
Monday: HG & AP

Total whammies: 45.

Also, we've got a bit of a mice problem in our kitchen. This might have been a gift from the skinny gods, as it caused me to purge EVERYTHING in our snack cabinet (since the mice had eaten through 1/2 of it anyway.) Ew. ew. ew.

Fortunately (unfortunately) I still have my bag of Easter candy, which I think I should just throw away if I want to have any chance at this.

R.I.P. Before Pictures

Over the (far less healthy than it should have been) weekend, I gasped as I realized that if my hard drive was erased (which it was), then I no longer have my BEFORE PICTURES! Sad. 

Thank goodness we still have gems like these:

I used to have that creation so often (nearly every day...gross) that it was named after me. And that is only one quarter of it. I'm glad this shot also includes part of the ONE LITER OF SUNKIST that was included in the Bobby Special. The orange soda alone was 11 points, or more than a third of my points for the day.

I found this picture while making the Facebook event for the party celebrating the memory of Craig and my apartment. This giant afternoon spectacle will be taking place two weeks before The Former Fatties comes to a close. Rather than not drinking that day, I'm just going to convince Katy to come drink with me. I also request the presence of Alex, Nikki, and Jeandog.

32 days...

Before I Forget

YES we're posting every Whammie! I have a lot of things to say but I"m going to fall asleep in the next 30 seconds and don't want my Whammies to go uncounted.

HG's yesterday and today. And I officially haven't worked out since Friday. I rule / suck.

Total Whammies's: 41

I don't even know what I just ate

I just know... it was amazing.

(Oh before I start, Bobby talked about instating a rule that "whammies" only count if they're blogged about within 2 days of getting them. Are we doing this, BoRo? If so, I got a double whammy today, and a double whammy yesterday, and my APs in Monday.)

At the gym, like any other minute of my life, I was planning out my next meal. I decided I wanted something with mushrooms, since I'm on a mushroom binge lately (could be worse, right?). So I stopped at the little market on my way home and got some, and decided I would use the tomato I bought yesterday and didn't use, and our plethora of other frozen veggies to make a nice Italian stir fry. Is there such thing as an Italian stir fry? There is now.

Anyway, here's what I put in it:
- A spray of PAM
- Frozen asparagus, snapped into about 2" pieces
- About 1 tsp of chopped garlic
- Frozen spinach
- Frozen broccoli that I defrosted in the microwave first
- Portabello mushrooms, quartered
- 1/2 tomato, gutted and diced
- A splash of oil to get things moving
- A pinch of parsley
- Garlic salt
- Canamella seasoning (salt, garlic, black pepper, capsicum)
- A sprinkle of Parmesan cheese at the end

I basically just let it saute over medium heat as I kept throwing ingredients in. I then toasted 2 pieces of light wheat bread and drizzled EVOO on it and then put more of that Canamella seasoning on it. This is my new favorite thing on earth, it is so good.

Overall points for this meal? 4 would be generous. SERIOUSLY. (say 3 pts for the oil, 1 pt for the bread, maybe .5 for the cheese, and veggies are f-r-e-e-).

I wish I didn't inhale it as fast as wolverene, and I could have taken a picture. Besides the garlic/salt overdose I'll be experiencing any minute now, it was divine.

Few things in life make me as happy and satisfied as food does. Very few.

TYJ (Thank you Jesus)

Okay, I officially want to say that I think Easter is the fattest day of the year. At least for me. Let's discuss what I ate yesterday. I am not going to count the points, because if I did, I would commit suicide.

5 pieces of bacon (it was good bacon, OK?)
with ketchup
a piece of ham with honey mustard dressing
snazzy raspberry and apple stuffed French toast that I made from a Weight Watchers recipe (I had good intentions)
breakfast potatoes
...another serving of breakfast potatoes
a glass of OJ
a glass of fruit punch
an egg salad sandwich (made with my dyed eggs of course) made with light mayo & dijon mustard on light bread
Another small piece of ham
Cadburry cream egg
another bite of Alex's Cadbury cream egg
about 500 Peeps
Starburst jellybeans (sugar high through the roof at this point, I couldn't stop singing a song to Alex about "my little china baby doll"... I don't know)
Oh... and a Taco Bell bean burrito, because that was necessary. So was drinking some of Alex's Mountain Dew. And taking a bite of his cheesy gordita crunch.

Fortunately, and so sick of me, but I justify pigging out THAT much because of the fact that the night before, I drank so much that I threw up and also threw up my Greek salad dinner. So to me, I was just re-eating dinner...or something.

A really healthy approach to dieting... right here. FML.

I am trying out for WFG on Broadway. That means Worlds Fattest Girl.

Oh screw jinxing.

My computer works so I made this video about Monday. I shaved last night for ideal scruffiness Monday. 

I'm glad Katy is confident I'm going to win, cause that makes one of us. I think this is going to be DOWN TO THE WIRE, folks. 

Going on record

Going on record to say I am about 90% sure I am going to lose, but Bobby deserves to win.

But, we'll see.

Hello World (I know at least one person has read us internationally.)

My computer has sadly been out of commision since this weekend, and is now in the shop. I thought I could blog from my phone but it was being stupid. So now I'm using Craig's computer to blog/charge my phone/watch Lost/see Katy's torso.

I'd like to congratulate Katy on the completion of her challenge and hope she plans on claiming her prize soon. Also, when the bet is over "The Former Fatties" should probably turn into DVD series in which Katy just shakes her ass and I can be heard guffawing off camera. That throwback picture was awesome. It should be noted that I went out and bought that shirt the day of that party because I had lost some weight and wanted to get something that I looked skinny in. I just put it in a bag to give away because it is huge on me.

I will be completing my challenge, even though it doesn't seem to have a prize, as I have extra motivation to look really great on Monday. I really want to tell you all about it, World, and even planned to video blog about it, but I think I'll wait until after it is done. Katy and I have spoken a lot about our tendency to tell the whole world about something and then it not happen, so I don't want to jinx it. I will say though that while in all likelyhood nothing comes of this, I never would have even tried had it not been for the Former Fatties. I think I've officially become the Emo Former Fattie. Sorry, I just love not being obese.

Due to computer mayhem, I'll be posting whenever I get a computer opportunity, but I've been keeping track via Weight Watchers mobile on my phone for a few days.

Finally, I really eat throughout the day, so I'm just listing things in the order I ate them rather than giving my meals names.

TUESDAY (aka "Sausage Day")
Total Points: 30 / 30
Whammies: 1 (I worked out, but assumed when I was counting all my points I was getting my HG's. I was not.) 36 total whammies.

• 1 Leftover turkey sausage with some onions and peppers on a potato roll - 6
• 2 eggs and a potato roll - 6
• 1 Apple - 1
• 3/4 cup Special K Protein Plus & 1/2 cup FiberOne - 1!
• 2 chicken sausages on potato rolls (I guess it was more "potato roll day" than "sausage day"), with entire box of frozen brocolli - 11.5
• At this point I had 4.5 points left, so I had one serving of tostitos with some salsa. The chips are 3 pts for a serving, but hard to measure, and the salsa is negligible, but I piled it on, so I'd say it came to about right - 4.5

WEDNESDAY

Total Points: 33/33 (Using my 3 activity points from doing the Shred, Level 3)

Whammies: 2, for a total of 38. How many do you have KF?

I'm not sure why blogger has begun double spacing, but I'm sure Katy is not going to be happy about it.

• 3 eggs and a potato roll - 8
• Salad with egg, oil & vinegar, avocado - 6
• 2 Reese's Peanut Butter Cups - 5 glorious points
• Dinner was tough as I went out with some friends visiting from the UK. We stumbled upon Katy and my old stomping ground, Josie's. I had one piece of whole grain bread (WHAMMIE!) Salmon, and mashed sweet potatos. As best I can figure, that comes to 14 points. It could be a little low as the mashed potatos were too delish not to contain lots of butter/cream/sin but I also think the 9 points ww.com tells me to give my salmon is a little high. So if it ends up a point or two higher, s'all good, I've got bonus points.

I do seem to have plateaued a bit, hopefully this week will help me break past that. I need to remind myself that one pound a week till the end of the challenge is MORE than enough.

Challenge complete.

Hey America. Just thought I'd check in and let you know I completed Bobby's challenge of doing the Shred 3 times in a week. I did level 1 twice, and level 2 once. I also recorded myself doing it the last time (yikes), which you'll see a preview of here.

So get ready, Internet, here's my torso.



And no, those last two moves were not Jillian Michaels. That was all me.

Bobby - ready for your challenge? I want you to journal your food/Points and blog your meals for at least 5 out of the 7 next days.

I hate when people use the term "throwback"

... but this is one.

This is the day Bobby and I met, wasted, at an industry party last June.

Bobby, you're not even recognizable.

Me, I basically look the same. I weighed about 4 lbs more than I do now. I gained weight from June-December, and have lost it all and then some since then.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

(ps BoRo - I just laughed my ass off at your videos. I'll make one later)

Anyone ever notice I only ever show my right muscle?

That is because my left one doesn't exist.

I think right now I'm about 5 - 10 pounds away from my ideal weight. That is crazy to me. It is made way less crazytown by the fact that I don't need to lose 5 pounds and be done. I need to lose about 20 pounds of fat but put on like 10 - 15 pounds of muscle. Going to the real gym today  got me excited for when I go home and have lifting buddies. Last night when I signed up there were so many guys there who were hot. This was exciting because a) I'm going to be doing what they are doing and therefore looking like they are looking b) for some reason the sight of hot guys is exciting to me. 

For the rest of my time in Astoria, I'm going to stop doing P90X doubles, where on muscle building days you do a separate hour of cardio as well. I'll focus more on muscle building and hopefully the fat burning will come (and also you do fat burning every other day anyway.) I am legitimately concerned right now about ending this bet and being TOO skinny.  In a few shots that ended up on the cutting room floor my arms looked almost Olsenesque. I know that is Katy's goal, but it sure ain't mine. 

I guess its also worth noting that I kinda feel like we are in the home stretch now, but really we are only slightly past halfway done. If we've gotten this far, we should seriously start thinking about hiring security for this summer--just for crowd control wherever we go. 

50 Days. 

Yes I was aware that my shirt was on inside out.